Single and ApPARENT
Greetings!
Being raised on a farm proves to be more pricelss for me by the day, how many times have I wished I could have given my son a similar experience. As an adult the benefits of that beginning far outweigh the disadvantages. That environment along with the Divine Blessing of the mom and dad I had resulted in my being a completely different person than I would have been had I been raised in a more urban environment. I am so deeply grateful and I’ll briefly share a few reasons why I feel this way.
My innocence remained intact in every single way. Climbing trees, building forts, fishing, walks through the forest, organic gardening, compounded by nothing less than positive examples of parenting were absorbed into every essence of my formation and foundation. How could it not? It was all I knew. So when I graduated from high school off I went, beyond innocent into a world of wolves! : )
When we woud take summer trips and go through what was considered “red light” district I recall my fascination as well as my siblings, as we starred in awe of men and women on street corners doing various “things”, wearing next to nothing. I remember us gasping as we emphatically said “look”! As my dad attempted to explain some of what being lost, broken and defeated looks like.
My parents modeled such an extradordinary value system to us. My beautiful mom exemplified what a “lady” was to me, and that well deserved opinion of her never changed. She was pretty, strong, brilliant, devoted, immaculately clean, and taught me and my siblings values. Values meaning “principles or standards,” and they were high. Today, particularly as I travel and look around society, I am so thankful they were high. My father reinforced those values in everything he did. I never recall him speaking foul language, and I mean not one single word. It’s unbelievable in contrast when I think of what I hear from adults today.
It continues to be revealed to me how much their values have influenced me. From my language, my choices in the people I allow the privelege of coming into my life, to what I have modeled for my son. Don’t get me wrong now, was I perfect as a parent? No, I made mistakes too, we all do. But my value system was always in place, that I never compromised. These examples and so many more are strictly results of the value system I was taught and further developed because they were too valuable for me to throw away. Never let anyone tell you values do not matter, they do.
Today’s society all too often robs children of any degree of innocence. Innocence in how they dress, dance, to how they speak. Why? Due largely to the influence of home followed by social media. When daughters or sons see their parents present theselves in any negative or provocative manner, they are absorbing it, I promise you that. When daughters or sons are exposed to a profane way of talking, they are absorbing that negativity too, I promise you that. Neither is ok if self-respect is of any degree of importance. Therefore, as a family life educator as I look at recent statistics around early sexual experiences and other societal issues the “dots” are all too often easy to connect.
Our children will learn their values OR lack there of from us and society will further influence. Please take the time to give the word “values” thought and ask yourself, what are your personal and family values? What are you “modeling” for your children. Unfortunately, some adults don’t know or even care. That’s sad to me, but I choose to focus on the ones that do.
There’s more on the importance of being a positive role model and positive influences vs negative influences in “Single And ApParent”. I hope you will find it enlightening.
Questions and comments are always welcome.
Peace~