Ready To Take The “Single And ApParent” Dating Oath?

Greetings!

As I talk with parents in various parenting groups I have observed managing the desire to date again poses conflict, the potential for neglect, as well as dangers most single parents are not even aware of.  I want to share with you what I consider to be the top 4 things to consider before you book that date.

1.  Too quick to “get back out there!”  If we are as committed to our responsibility as we should be, we’ll be sitting out many a weekend nights I know I sure did. Our “job” comes first and that “job” is our child, our family.
2. Leaving young adolescents alone at night to babysit themselves as well as their siblings should they have any, which of course in spite of reasoning, is a form of neglect.
3. Introducing your child early on to every single man or woman you date which not only is extremely distasteful, but is also completely against the best interest of the child. Their physical and emotional well being is ours to protect and there is never an acceptable reason to involve children in one’s dating life. There is a time and a place for such introduction should your relationship enhance to a serious level of commitment and not before.
4. Last but not least, grooming a child to call others “mommy or daddy” when in reality the child has absolutely no connection to that person aside from you “dating” them.  Unless that person is the child’s other biological parent such action is in the poorest of taste and once again is completely against the best physical and emotional interest of the child. To do so shows no respect for the child, the other party, and  certainly not yourself.

Solutions to the above?

1. I will quote what my beautiful and intelligent late father said to me when I was married and pregnant, “once you have a child you become old.”  After becoming a single parent spending those countless weekends, months, and sometimes years having a wonderful time with my beautiful son, but without a welcomed social life-I understood the meaning of his powerful words.

2. As long as that person is safe, continue to do everything you reasonably can to have a amicable relationship with your child’s other half. You have heard me say this so many times and I will continue to not only because it’s the right thing to do, not only because that person is their other half, but it also provides everyone involved a mutual break. If the child is spending the weekend or holiday with the other parent the custodial parent can actually plan quality social time. Absolutely everyone wins!

3. Simply take the “Single And ApParent” oath of “Never Ever!.”

4. Repeat the oath above.

Please share any comments or questions you might have about this, and if you are interested in a formal presentation for me to come to speak simply let me know.

Peace~